• The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that has been exposed to conference. - Fred Allen, American comic.


  • Don't tell my mother I work in an advertising agency - she thinks I play piano in a whorehouse. ~ Jacques Seguela.


  • I saw a subliminal advertising executive, but only for a second.


  • Advertising sure brings quick results--last week I advertised for a night watchman--the same night my safe was robbed.


  • One of life's disappointments is discovering that the man who writes the bank's ads is not the one who makes the loans.


  • How can you tell when a salesperson is lying? His lips are moving.


  • The Chevy Nova never sold well in Spanish speaking countries. "No va" means "it doesn't go" in Spanish.


  • Q. How many copywriters does it take to change a light bulb? A. "NOBODY changes ANYTHING!!" Q. How many art directors does it take to change a light bulb? A. "Does it have to be a light bulb?"


  • Advertising without research is like shooting an arrow into the air and then looking for a target to catch it with.


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